On Leadership

When Breath Becomes Air: What Death can Teach us about Leadership

640 640 Fahmida Zaman Ema

On a chilly night in late 2016, I was coming back from my university library at Illinois State University. On my way out, I picked up a book titled When Breath Becomes Air. Published posthumously in early 2016, When Breath Becomes Air was written by a neuroscientist named Paul Kalanithi, a 36-year-old resident in neurosurgery at Stanford University. Just months away from completing his training, Paul was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. He was a gifted scientist whose research on gene therapy won him his field’s highest research award. Adding to his impressive resume, he earned two degrees in English literature from Stanford University and gave serious consideration to pursing writing as a full-time career. He also held a Master of Arts in the History and Philosophy of Science and Medicine from University of Cambridge.

Much like anything else in his short life, Paul’s writing is brilliant to say the least. As you would see in When Breath Becomes Air, Paul spent his whole brief life searching for meaning in one way or another—through books, writing, medicine, surgery, and science. This short book, therefore, has so many layers of meaning and insights on life and death, patient and doctor, son and father, work and family, faith and reason. There is no shortage of insights in When Breath Becomes Air. Each reader can extrapolate their own set of insights from this reading. Following are some insights I found captivating.

Learning to be comfortable with uncertainties: The most important lesson in Paul’s story is that our future is uncertain. For years, Paul was preparing for a life he was never to live. The decade long medical training was about to end and he was to be a professor of neurosurgery. And once the training was done, he thought he could finally become the husband he promised to be. But, out of nowhere came cancer and Paul had to start living his life instead of postponing it. No part of this journey was easy for him. Future, as we see, is very uncertain. One must learn to be uncomfortable with such uncertainties. We rarely have an exact picture of the path ahead, so we must accept what arises with determined courage.

Compassion and humility: Much of what motivated Paul to pursue neurosurgery was the opportunity to forge relationships with people who were suffering and give him the chance to explore what life offers in meaning and scope. His relentless pursuit of human connection with his patients shows what makes life meaningful: the ability to feel another’s pain (and joy). Everyone fights their own battle. But, what differentiates human beings from any other animal is our ability to feel empathy. Nothing else could remind us of the importance of compassion and humility than facing our own mortality.

There is no small act: The world now is full of so many big problems. From the world-wide refugee crisis to climate change, the problems are too big for us to unravel. As a result, we rightly think that our individual acts do not matter in the grand scheme of things. Nevertheless, that is precisely what makes our individual small acts so significant. Our small kind act can mean the world to someone without us knowing. One may not need power or money to practice this kindness. We are capable of doing it from whichever position we are in. At the end of the book, Paul leaves a message for his daughter who he is not sure will remember him: “When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been and done and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more but rests, satisfied. In this time, right now, that is an enormous thing” (p. 199).

Faced with his own mortality just when he was on the verge of making big contributions to the world with his mind and hands, Paul reflected on what it means to lead a meaningful life. He wrote about the process of him transforming from doctor to patient, the struggles he had in his family, the power to talk about death and face it, all these and many others are contoured in such a thoughtful manner. When Breath Becomes Air is not an easy read. It is intense. It is tear-jerking. It is also a necessary read.

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āφāĻŽāϰāĻž āϜāĻžāύāĻŋ āύ⧇āϤ⧃āĻ¤ā§āĻŦ āϚāĻ°ā§āϚāĻž āĻ•āϰāϤ⧇ āĻšāϞ⧇ āĻ…āĻ‚āĻļāĻ—ā§āϰāĻšāĻŖāĻ•āĻžāϰ⧀ āĻ•āĻŋāĻ‚āĻŦāĻž āϜ⧜āĻŋāϤ āϏāĻ•āϞ⧇āϰ āϏāĻžāĻĨ⧇ āϏāĻŽā§āĻĒāĻ°ā§āĻ•āĻŋāϤ āĻāĻ•āϟāĻŋ āĻ•āĻžāϜ āϖ⧁āρāĻœā§‡ āĻŦ⧇āϰ āĻ•āϰāϤ⧇ āĻšā§Ÿ āϝāĻžāϕ⧇ āφāĻŽāϰāĻž ‘āĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāĻ°ā§āĻ• āĻ…ā§āϝāĻžāϟ āĻĻā§āϝāĻž āϏ⧇āĻ¨ā§āϟāĻžāĻ°â€™ āĻŦāϞāĻŋāĨ¤ āφāĻŽāĻžāĻĻ⧇āϰ āωāĻĻā§āĻĻ⧇āĻļā§āϝ āĻšāĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāϰ āĻ•āĻĨāĻž āϝ⧇ āϏāĻ•āϞ⧇āϰ āĻĒā§āϰāϧāĻžāύ āĻŽāύ⧋āϝ⧋āĻ— āϝ⧇āύ āĻŽāĻžāĻā§‡āϰ āĻāχ āĻ•āĻžāϜāϟāĻŋāϕ⧇ āĻāĻ—āĻŋā§Ÿā§‡ āύāĻŋā§Ÿā§‡ āϝāĻžāĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāϰ āϜāĻ¨ā§āϝ āĻšā§ŸāĨ¤ āϤāĻžāϰ āϜāĻ¨ā§āϝ āϝāĻžāϰ āϝāĻžāϰ āĻ…āĻŦāĻ¸ā§āĻĨāĻžāύ āĻĨ⧇āϕ⧇ āϏāĻŦāĻžāχ āĻšā§‡āĻˇā§āϟāĻž āĻ•āϰ⧇ āϝāĻžā§ŸāĨ¤

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āφāĻ°ā§āĻœā§‡āĻ¨ā§āϟāĻŋāύāĻž āĻĻāϞāϟāĻŋāϕ⧇ āĻĻ⧇āĻ–āϞ⧇ āĻŦāĻŋāώ⧟āϟāĻž āĻ…āύ⧇āĻ•āϟāĻžāχ āĻĒāϰāĻŋāĻˇā§āĻ•āĻžāϰ āĻšā§Ÿā§‡ āϝāĻžā§ŸāĨ¤ āϝ⧇āĻ–āĻžāύ⧇ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āϏāĻžāĻĨ⧇ āϜ⧜āĻŋāϤ āϏāĻŦāĻžāϰ āĻŽāύ⧋āϝ⧋āϗ⧇āϰ āϕ⧇āĻ¨ā§āĻĻā§āϰ āĻŦāĻŋāĻ¨ā§āĻĻ⧁ āĻšāĻ“ā§ŸāĻž āĻĻāϰāĻ•āĻžāϰ āĻ›āĻŋāϞ āĻŦāĻŋāĻļā§āĻŦāĻ•āĻžāĻĒ āĻœā§‡āϤāĻž āĻāĻŦāĻ‚ āϏ⧇ āϞāĻ•ā§āĻˇā§āϝ⧇ āϏāĻŦāĻžāχ āĻāĻ• āϏāĻžāĻĨ⧇ āĻ•āĻžāϜ āĻ•āϰāĻžāĨ¤ āĻ•āĻŋāĻ¨ā§āϤ⧁ āĻŽā§‡āϏāĻŋāϰ āĻŽāϤ āϤāĻžāϰāĻ•āĻž āĻĨāĻžāĻ•āĻžā§Ÿ āϐ āĻ•āĻžāĻœā§‡āϰ āĻŦāĻĻāϞ⧇ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āϕ⧇āĻ¨ā§āĻĻā§āϰāĻŦāĻŋāĻ¨ā§āĻĻ⧁ āϏ⧇ āύāĻŋāĻœā§‡āχ āĻĒāϰāĻŋāĻŖāϤ āĻšā§Ÿā§‡āϛ⧇āĨ¤ āϝāĻžāϰ āĻ•āĻžāϰāϪ⧇ āύāĻž āĻŽā§‡āϏāĻŋ āϤāĻžāϰ āϏāĻžāĻŽāĻ°ā§āĻĨā§āϝ⧇āϰ āϏāĻŦāϟ⧁āϕ⧁ āĻĻāĻŋā§Ÿā§‡ āϖ⧇āϞāϤ⧇ āĻĒ⧇āϰ⧇āϛ⧇ āύāĻž āĻĻāϞ āϤāĻžāĻĻ⧇āϰ āĻŽā§āϞ āĻ•āĻžāĻœā§‡āϰ āωāĻĒāϰ āĻŽāύ⧋āϝ⧋āĻ— āĻĻāĻŋāϤ⧇ āĻĒ⧇āϰ⧇āϛ⧇āĨ¤

⧍āĨ¤ āϏāĻŽāĻ¨ā§āĻŦ⧟āĻšā§€āύāϤāĻžāσ

āĻāĻ•āϟāĻž āĻĻāϞ āĻšāĻŋāϏ⧇āĻŦ⧇ āϕ⧋āύ āϏāĻŽāĻ¸ā§āϝāĻžāϰ āϏāĻŽāĻžāϧāĻžāύ āĻ•āϰāϤ⧇ āĻšāϞ⧇ āύāĻŋāĻœā§‡āĻĻ⧇āϰ āĻŽāĻ§ā§āϝ⧇ āϏāĻŽāĻ¨ā§āĻŦ⧟ āĻ­āĻžāϞ⧋ āĻšāϤ⧇ āĻšā§ŸāĨ¤ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āĻŽāĻ§ā§āϝ⧇ āĻŦāĻŋāĻļā§āĻŦāĻ¸ā§āϤāϤāĻž āĻĨāĻžāĻ•āϤ⧇ āĻšā§Ÿ, āϜāĻžāύāϤ⧇ āĻšā§Ÿ āϕ⧇ āĻ•āĻ–āύ āĻ•āĻŋ āĻ­ā§‚āĻŽāĻŋāĻ•āĻž āĻĒāĻžāϞāύ āĻ•āϰāϤ⧇ āĻĒāĻžāϰ⧇āĨ¤ āĻŽā§‡āϏāĻŋ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āϕ⧇āĻ¨ā§āĻĻā§āϰāĻŦāĻŋāĻ¨ā§āĻĻ⧁ āĻĒāϰāĻŋāĻŖāϤ āĻšāĻ“ā§ŸāĻžā§Ÿ āϤāĻžāϰ āϏāĻžāĻĨ⧇ āϏāĻ–ā§āϝāϤāĻž āύāĻž āĻĨāĻžāĻ•āĻžā§Ÿ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āĻŽāĻ§ā§āϝ⧇ āϏāĻŽāĻ¨ā§āĻŦ⧟āĻšā§€āύāϤāĻž āĻ•āĻžāϜ āĻ•āϰāĻžāϰ āϏāĻŽā§āĻ­āĻžāĻŦāύāĻž āϤ⧈āϰāĻŋ āĻšā§Ÿā§‡āϛ⧇āĨ¤ āύāĻžāχāĻœā§‡āϰāĻŋ⧟āĻžāϰ āϏāĻžāĻĨ⧇ āϖ⧇āϞāĻžā§Ÿ āφāĻ°ā§āĻœā§‡āĻ¨ā§āϟāĻŋāύāĻž āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āϏāĻžāĻĢāĻ˛ā§āϝ⧇āϰ āĻĒ⧇āĻ›āύ⧇ āĻŽā§‡āϏāĻŋ āφāϰ āĻŦāĻžāύ⧇āĻ—āĻžāϰ āϝ⧇ āϏāĻŽāĻ¨ā§āĻŦ⧟ āϤāĻž āĻ…āĻ¨ā§āϝāϤāĻŽ āĻĒā§āϰāϧāĻžāĻŖ āĻ­ā§‚āĻŽāĻŋāĻ•āĻž āĻĒāĻžāϞāύ āĻ•āϰ⧇āϛ⧇āĨ¤ āĻāĻŽāύ āĻŦāĻŋāĻļā§āĻŦāĻ¸ā§āϤ āϏāĻŽāĻ¨ā§āĻŦ⧟ āϤāĻžāĻĻ⧇āϰ āφāϗ⧇āϰ āĻāĻŦāĻ‚ āĻĒāϰ⧇āϰ āϖ⧇āϞāĻžā§Ÿ āĻšā§‹āϖ⧇ āĻĒāϰ⧇ āύāĻŋāĨ¤ āĻāĻ–āĻžāύ⧇ āϝāĻĻāĻŋ āĻĻāϞ⧇āϰ āϕ⧇āĻ¨ā§āĻĻā§āϰ āĻŦāĻŋāĻ¨ā§āĻĻ⧁ āĻŽā§‡āϏāĻŋ āύāĻž āĻšā§Ÿā§‡ āĻŦāĻŋāĻļā§āĻŦāĻ•āĻžāĻĒ āĻœā§‡āϤāĻžāϤ⧇āχ āϏāĻŦāĻžāϰ āĻŽāύ⧋āϝ⧋āĻ— āĻĨāĻžāĻ•āϤ āϤāĻžāĻšāϞ⧇ āϝāĻžāϰ āϝāĻžāϰ āϜāĻžā§ŸāĻ—āĻžā§Ÿ āϏāĻŦāĻžāχ āĻŦāĻŋāĻļā§āĻŦāĻ¸ā§āϤ āĻ­ā§‚āĻŽāĻŋāĻ•āĻž āĻĒāĻžāϞāύ āĻ•āϰāϤ⧇ āĻĒāĻžāϰāϤ⧋āĨ¤

ā§ŠāĨ¤ āϟāĻŋāĻŽ āĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāĻ°ā§āĻ•āσ

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ā§ĒāĨ¤ āĻ•āĻ°ā§āϤ⧃āĻĒāĻ•ā§āώ⧇āϰ āĻŦā§āϝāĻ°ā§āĻĨāϤāĻžāσ

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Three Leadership Lessons from Ambassador Leoni Cuelenaere

5184 2184 Fahmida Zaman Ema

Ambassador of the Embassy of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, Leoni Cuelenaere, met with BYLC graduates on June 5, 2018. Ms. Cuelenaere’s time as the Ambassador in Bangladesh, starting in 2015, has contributed to building an excellent relationship between the Netherlands and Bangladesh. Before Bangladesh, Leoni Cuelenaere served as the Ambassador of the Embassy of the Kingdom of the Netherlands to Zimbabwe, Sri Lanka, Yemen, and Rwanda.

During her visit to BYLC, she met with graduates from the recent BBLT program to talk about opportunities and challenges young people face in the countries. Recalling her experiences in Bangladesh, she stated with hope that so much is possible in Bangladesh as its greatest strengths are young people and their energy.

Leoni Cuelenaere also shared a few leadership lessons with the participants from her own decades long public service career.

You are part of a team: Ms. Cuelenaere said to the graduates that always remember, you are not just a boss. You are part of a team. When your team does well, it’s the team’s success. When it doesn’t, take the responsibility for the failure. But, the important part of your job is to work with identify and develop your team member’s strengths.

Listen to others: When you are working and hold a position of power of some sorts, people may not always say it when they disagree with you. It is your responsibility to find ways to listen to what your team members are really thinking. Therefore, you must create a work culture of truly listening to your colleagues.

Learn to take criticism: One of the most important lessons you must learn is to listen to criticism. Allow your team members to criticize you. When you are criticized, go back to yourself and reflect what may have gone wrong. If you are wrong, learn to say sorry. There is no harm in saying sorry.

Ms. Cuelenaere has been an avid supporter of BYLC’s work. She was also excited to learn about the student’s Leadership in Actions projects and how the participants would continue to contribute to their societies while achieving their personal goals.

āϟāĻŋāĻŽāĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāĻ°ā§āĻ•; āϕ⧇āύ āĻāĻŦāĻ‚ āĻ•āĻŋāĻ­āĻžāĻŦ⧇

1086 724 Jamia Rahman Khan Tisa

‘āϤ⧋āĻŽāϰāĻž āϤ⧋ āĻāĻ•āϟāĻž āϟāĻŋāĻŽ āĻ āĻ•āĻžāϜ āĻ•āϰāϛ⧋āĨ¤ āϟāĻŋāĻŽāĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāĻ°ā§āĻ• āϖ⧁āĻŦ āϗ⧁āϰ⧁āĻ¤ā§āĻŦāĻĒā§‚āĻ°ā§āĻŖÂ  āĻāĻ•āϟāĻž āĻŦā§āϝāĻžāĻĒāĻžāϰāĨ¤ āϟāĻŋāĻŽā§‡ āϕ⧇āω āϝāĻĻāĻŋ āϕ⧋āύ āϭ⧁āϞ āĻ•āϰ⧇āĻ“ āĻĢ⧇āϞ⧇ āϏ⧇āϟāĻžāϰ āϜāĻ¨ā§āϝ āϤāĻžāϕ⧇ āĻšā§‡ā§Ÿ āĻ•āϰ⧋āύāĻž, āĻŦāϰāĻ‚ āϤāĻžāϕ⧇ āĻļāĻŋāĻ–āϤ⧇ āϏāĻžāĻšāĻžāĻ¯ā§āϝ āĻ•āϰ⧋āĨ¤ āϞāĻžāĻ­āϟāĻž āĻĒ⧁āϰ⧋ āϟāĻŋāĻŽā§‡āϰāχ āĻšāĻŦ⧇āĨ¤â€ āφāĻŽāĻžāĻĻ⧇āϰ āĻĄā§‡āĻŽā§‹ āĻĒā§āϰ⧇āĻœā§‡āĻ¨ā§āĻŸā§‡āĻļāύ⧇āϰ āϏāĻŽā§Ÿ āĻāĻ•āĻĨāĻžāϟāĻžāχ āĻŦāϞ⧇āĻ›āĻŋāϞ⧇āύ āĻŦ⧇āϏāϰāĻ•āĻžāϰāĻŋ āĻŦāĻŋāĻœā§āĻžāĻžāĻĒāύ⧀ āϏāĻ‚āĻ¸ā§āĻĨāĻž āĻŦāĻŋāϟāĻĒā§€āϰ āϚāĻŋāĻĢ āĻ…ā§āϝāĻžāĻĄāĻ­āĻžāĻ°ā§āϟāĻžāχāϜāĻŋāĻ‚ āĻ…āĻĢāĻŋāϏāĻžāϰ āĻ…āϰ⧂āĻĒ āĻ¸ā§āϝāĻžāĻ¨ā§āϝāĻžāϞāĨ¤ āĻ•āĻŋāϛ⧁āĻĻāĻŋāύ āφāϗ⧇ āχāωāĻāύāĻĄāĻŋāĻĒāĻŋ āĻ†ā§Ÿā§‹āϜāĻŋāϤ āĻāĻ•āϟāĻž āφāχāĻĄāĻŋ⧟āĻž āχāύ⧋āϭ⧇āĻļāύ āĻ•āĻŽā§āĻĒāĻŋāϟāĻŋāĻļāύ⧇ āφāĻŽāĻŋ āĻĢāĻžāχāύāĻžāϞāĻŋāĻ¸ā§āϟ āĻšāχāĨ¤ āϏ⧇āχ āϏ⧁āĻŦāĻžāĻĻ⧇āχ āχāωāĻāύāĻĄāĻŋāĻĒāĻŋ āĻĨ⧇āϕ⧇ āφāĻŽāĻžāĻĻ⧇āϰ āϜāĻ¨ā§āϝ āĻāĻ•āϟāĻŋ āĻ“ā§ŸāĻžāĻ°ā§āĻ•āĻļāĻĒ⧇āϰ āĻŦā§āϝāĻŦāĻ¸ā§āĻĨāĻž āĻ•āϰāĻž āĻšā§Ÿ āϝ⧇āĻ–āĻžāύ⧇ āφāĻŽāϰāĻž āĻĒā§āϰāĻœā§‡āĻ•ā§āϟ āĻĒā§āĻ˛ā§āϝāĻžāύāĻŋāĻ‚ āĻāĻŦāĻ‚ āϤāĻž āĻĒā§āϰ⧇āĻœā§‡āĻ¨ā§āĻŸā§‡āĻļāύ āϏāĻŽā§āĻĒāĻ°ā§āϕ⧇ āĻšāĻžāϤ⧇ āĻ•āϞāĻŽā§‡ āĻļ⧇āĻ–āĻžāϰ āϏ⧁āϝ⧋āĻ— āĻĒāĻžāχāĨ¤ read more

BYLC Talks: Insights from Mikael Hemniti Winther

2803 1887 Lamiya Jabbar

This week I met the Danish Ambassador to Bangladesh. Dressed in a sharp dark blue suit and black shirt he looked rather sharp. But his physical appearance is accompanied with a contrasting relaxed demeanor fitting of a young musician. But he is a musician, it turns out. Mikael Hemniti Winther, in addition to his role as the Danish Ambassador to Bangladesh, is also a guitarist who jams with local musicians wherever he is posted and has even played at the Jazz Blues Festival in Dhaka. Just as his hobbies set him apart, his professional accomplishments set him apart as well. His career journey spans from teaching at Copenhagen University to holding top positions at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in Denmark to being posted as Deputy Head of Mission in Vietnam to becoming the Ambassador to Thailand, Iraq, and Bangladesh. read more

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